ZOMG!!! ONE WEEK!!!! OPENING DAY!!!! CAN. NOT. WAIT!!!!!
Mar 30, 2009
A Public Service Announcement...
There are some terms in this world that, because they are not fully understood, are frightening. One of these terms directly affects me and my ability to build relationships with people. The term? Atheist.
Now. When people get to know me as an individual, this term is rarely an issue. This post is NOT for those of you who haven't bothered to get to know me as an individual. This post is for those of you who already know me and might not fully understand what I believe and how this affects the kind of person I am. This post is also for others who might be struggling with their own faith or lack thereof.
I was raised in a Catholic home and was a practicing Catholic through college. I taught Religious Education during college to 1st graders and then to the 10th grade Confirmation class that led me to become the Confirmation Leader at the Church of the Nativity for two years. I will never claim to have been the most devout Catholic, but I tried for a very long time to believe what the Church taught me. Despite all this religious education, I still had questions. Even as a child. I would ask why all the other religions were "wrong" and the answer, "Because they are..." never quite satisfied me. I also struggled with certain absolutes of the religion of my upbringing and wondered why most of the Catholics I knew only followed some of the rules some of the time. It wasn't until I left for graduate school that I really started to re-evaluate my thoughts on my faith.
I tried desperately for a very long time to believe in something and didn't decide on my current worldview without a great deal of reflection, discussion, and learning. I started attending the Unitarian Universalist church and the question of "Why" persisted. I dabbled in other religious expressions and the question of "Why" still remained. I thought that to NOT believe in something was to make life meaningless. It wasn't until I REALLY started to rationalize my own personal philosophy (after much reading and discussing and thinking) that I realized that I DID believe in lots of things...even if a "god" wasn't among those things anymore. I also realized that a lack of faith can inject a great deal of meaning into my life and it filled a void I feared I was going to lose when I lost religion.
Today I am MUCH more agnostic than militant atheist (even though those jerks get ALL the press!). Do I believe in God? Not really. Do I know with any certainty that there is/isn't a God? Nope. Do I "believe" in being a good person? Absolutely! There are certain guidelines that any decent person must adhere to. Honesty, Kindness, Empathy, Trust, Acceptance, Love, etc... Some would call these Christian values which is fine. If I am the first agnostic person to proclaim that I have Christian values I'm totally fine with that.
What meaning is there to life from an agnostic worldview? LOTS! For me, this life is the only one I'm sure of, so I need to make it the best it can be. I need to make my mark through kindness and generosity now... I need to experience as much as possible now... I need to be a good person...now. I still want to do all these things even without the promise of eternal reward. My most frustrating moments are those when I am judged to be a horrible person just because I believe in one fewer God than most. Most days, I believe I behave in what most would consider very "Christian" ways. I no longer take my morals and ethics from religion, but my morals and ethics are still there and are still very strong and include compassion, love, trust, honesty, kindness, sacrifice, and acceptance.
What if I'm wrong? Well...I was baptised Catholic so I'll just hang out in Purgatory for all eternity so I've got that going for me. :)
Now. When people get to know me as an individual, this term is rarely an issue. This post is NOT for those of you who haven't bothered to get to know me as an individual. This post is for those of you who already know me and might not fully understand what I believe and how this affects the kind of person I am. This post is also for others who might be struggling with their own faith or lack thereof.
I was raised in a Catholic home and was a practicing Catholic through college. I taught Religious Education during college to 1st graders and then to the 10th grade Confirmation class that led me to become the Confirmation Leader at the Church of the Nativity for two years. I will never claim to have been the most devout Catholic, but I tried for a very long time to believe what the Church taught me. Despite all this religious education, I still had questions. Even as a child. I would ask why all the other religions were "wrong" and the answer, "Because they are..." never quite satisfied me. I also struggled with certain absolutes of the religion of my upbringing and wondered why most of the Catholics I knew only followed some of the rules some of the time. It wasn't until I left for graduate school that I really started to re-evaluate my thoughts on my faith.
I tried desperately for a very long time to believe in something and didn't decide on my current worldview without a great deal of reflection, discussion, and learning. I started attending the Unitarian Universalist church and the question of "Why" persisted. I dabbled in other religious expressions and the question of "Why" still remained. I thought that to NOT believe in something was to make life meaningless. It wasn't until I REALLY started to rationalize my own personal philosophy (after much reading and discussing and thinking) that I realized that I DID believe in lots of things...even if a "god" wasn't among those things anymore. I also realized that a lack of faith can inject a great deal of meaning into my life and it filled a void I feared I was going to lose when I lost religion.
Today I am MUCH more agnostic than militant atheist (even though those jerks get ALL the press!). Do I believe in God? Not really. Do I know with any certainty that there is/isn't a God? Nope. Do I "believe" in being a good person? Absolutely! There are certain guidelines that any decent person must adhere to. Honesty, Kindness, Empathy, Trust, Acceptance, Love, etc... Some would call these Christian values which is fine. If I am the first agnostic person to proclaim that I have Christian values I'm totally fine with that.
What meaning is there to life from an agnostic worldview? LOTS! For me, this life is the only one I'm sure of, so I need to make it the best it can be. I need to make my mark through kindness and generosity now... I need to experience as much as possible now... I need to be a good person...now. I still want to do all these things even without the promise of eternal reward. My most frustrating moments are those when I am judged to be a horrible person just because I believe in one fewer God than most. Most days, I believe I behave in what most would consider very "Christian" ways. I no longer take my morals and ethics from religion, but my morals and ethics are still there and are still very strong and include compassion, love, trust, honesty, kindness, sacrifice, and acceptance.
What if I'm wrong? Well...I was baptised Catholic so I'll just hang out in Purgatory for all eternity so I've got that going for me. :)
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